October 13, 2010; It's All Over, Dammit!

Well, it's over.

I was in a funk from my news from Ceecee. Now, when I get in a funk I don't get like the Boys—quiet, introverted, gray—I get pissy, literally and figuratively. I bitch, I whine, I tear things and break things and eat things and mostly I mark things. But because, when I mark things openly, Skeeter goes ballistic, I do it in hiding. So they know something is amiss—the smell is unmistakeable—but they don't know where, how or when.

I was in that kind of fucking mood, you know?, when smart people know not to mess with me. Well, apparently, Boo-Boo does not fall into the category. He was being insanely dumb. He was teasing me and grabbing at me and working out his stress (which is something quite monumental) by being in my fucking face when he just shouldn't have been.

It reached it's peak, last night. He had been playing with me and was not getting that I was not playing; that I was not nipping him, as we wrestled, but actually biting. The idiot said, "So you want to play rough, do you!" What a mega-twat!!! A few minutes later he got out a can of Lay's Stax. Now, if I had my druthers, I would take a Pringle; Stax are just a weird, cheap, gross knock-off. But they're edible. So there he was, on the couch, stuffing his fucking face and not offering me a-one. I was sitting on the floor, staring at him, like some obedient, yappy fucking lap-dog. And then...then...I can hardly get the words out...

He wanted me to sit-fucking-pretty!!!! Do you fucking believe it?!?!?!?! He was holding a chip just above my head. Then, once, I stood on my hinds for it and he snatched it away and said, "Sit pretty!" Then twice. I jumped. Then a third time...

"GIVE ME THE MOTHERFUCKING CHIP YOU COCKSUCKER!!!!!" I roared.

"There you go," Skeeter murmured from the La-Z-Boy.

There was a long, long, long silence. Boo stared at me. He did not blink. "Give me the chip," I said and he did. And he stared. And I said, "Yeah, well."

I hopped up on the couch and took my place on his legs and pretended to snooze. Not too much later, with not a word spoken, we all went to bed. I pretended to sleep, snored a little. But I knew a Pandora's box had been open and all sorts of shit was going to pour out. When Boo got up, this morning, we did the regular stuff and just as he was walking out the door for work he said, "We're going to talk about this."

"Yeah, well, we'll see," I muttered.

"Oh yeah! We'll see all right!!!" he said stupidly.

Oh! fuck shit cunt!