Oh-oh!
Skeeter has a new project and, as if he didn't spend enough time there, the whole damn thing is done over the internet. Though he is, for the first time in a long time, outlandishly happy it means I really have to work hard to get access to the computer. Hey! I have my own goddam blog and I have fan mail to answer. But he and Boo-Boo can never know about these things as I suspect they'd be mightily pissed off if they read how I write about them.
My things are private. Skeeter's...not so much. I love that he thinks I'm such a goomer that I can't fiddle with his iPad and computer; can't look at the history on his browser to see what kind of lefty, neo-commie crap he looks at, what kind of lurid porn which delights him, what electronic toys he dreams of having. He doesn't know how much of an open book he is.
My life online, though, is all mine and his new project is keeping me away from it and this is a pain in the arse because the world out there is interesting. I have my dog pals (you'd be amazed how much time dogs spend online while their people are at work), I have my Twitter account where me and my friends exchange tips on taming our people even as we drive them mad.
And now I am getting a lot of news from my sister Ceecee.
"Dear Dee," she wrote recently. "My life has certainly become odd. With Milly gone there was much talk of Winnie going into a home and not being able to take me with her. But she was having none of that and told her children and Milly's in no uncertain terms she was staying put. But she decided to placate them a bit and did something very brave: she got herself a roommate—a perfect stranger!
"Ruth is a strange bird. She swears like a crack-whore, never denies herself a tipple and smokes what I think is weed but which she assures Winnie is just an exotic Turkish cigarette. I'm fairly sure it is an illegal substance because she becomes very calm after puffing for a little and then gets very hungry. Millie makes a fine show of Puritanism, but it is a show as she titters madly at the swearing and has begun to drink along with Ruth while the two of them play gin, rather ruthlessly (excuse the pun). In a very short while they have become close friends.
"And I...
"Well I have become friends with Ruth's parrot. His name is Joey and he shrieks inanities in Human to keep the old ladies amused but talks to me in Dog Speak. Joey has a very thick accent so we have to go back and forth—me in my awful Bird, him in his broken Dog. But he is wickedly funny and reminds me so much of you! He calls the ladies his Beloved Old Twats and makes jokes about their bathroom habits (which, as they become older, is rather an obssession with them as well). Really, Dearheart, much like you! Imagine that!"
So Ceecee is happy and has gotten through her awful time in one piece. But I have to admit that it makes me a little jealous that she has a friend, and moreso because it's a bird.
Now, with the arrival of a real winter (as opposed to all that slop that was falling from the sky in November), everyone here is preparing for the cold and Christmas. Coccooning. And so I have to creep out of Boo's bed late at night to do my online stuff. It was a pain 'til I realized there is a whole world of doggie night-owls out there doing the same thing.
And we have a blast!
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